Gratitude

Unsettled

In my last post I shared a feeling of ‘settled’. I knew that it would pass. All conditioned things are impermanent–transient, evanescent, inconstant. My autumn training camp has come to an end. There’s been tremendous growth in fitness, with nutrition, emotionally, and relationally. Nevertheless, upon reflection to the start of my trip, there are decisions for which I wish I could have mulligans. Play the course as it is, and the ball as it lies. Mammaw Undoubtedly, in the quote above, my grandmother was only referring to golf, but it does reflect the practical side of her nature. I have blinders that

A Simple Life

I’m learning that the simpler my life is the happier I am. Yet, there is renitent energy. Even while acknowledging my happiness-simplicity experience, there’s something inside me that is resistant to living increasingly simply. What is that element? I can hear the addictive patterns scream out in fear of answering the question. Fear/Addiction: Don’t look closer, don’t inquire. And, God forbid, don’t even think about asking the question about what it means to live a simple life? Me: Why not? Fear/Addiction: Because you might have to give up something? Me: Um, well, isn’t that kind of the point? (In order

Orange Blossoms

There’s a saying, “A grateful heart is magnet for miracles.” I arrived in Málaga, then Marbella, somewhat frustrated with various aspects of the day’s travel. During the next 12 hours an ongoing question rolled in my mind, why am I here? Plans for attending this Ironman 70.3 competition were made long ago: the goal, qualify for the 70.3 World Championships in Port Elizabeth, South Africa. But that was prior to a recent decision, and before visiting my new favourite training and, perhaps, living location. The Decision As I felt into volunteering for the ÖtillÖ World Championship, it became stunningly clear that my

What It’s All About

Falling asleep last night was a slow process. Pain was present throughout the entire body, inside and out: sunburn, blisters, muscle aches, joint stiffness, abrasions, internal systems in turmoil, you name it. Today, looking over my race stats and feeling the subtle sensations, I notice that I don’t want anything to do with the sun right now, which is very unusual for me. A friend of mine asked if the heat at Ironman Los Cabos was similar to Ironman Kona: no, Kona can be hotter but the sun in Los Cabos feels more intense. My heart rate was too high

Grateful

Grateful Grateful for this beautiful day. Grateful for outstanding health. Grateful for breath. Grateful for clean water. Grateful for silence and stillness. Grateful for being a conduit through which Life experiences itself. Grateful for nature. Grateful for colours (especially green). Grateful for being a warrior. Grateful for friends and sangha. Grateful for learning. Grateful for unlearning. namaste, 🙏 ✌️➕🌱

Courage & Confidence

I often ask myself why I continue to train for and compete in Ironman events–both half- & full distance. To be honest, it’s a scary question because what if the answer is “I don’t want to”. Then what? The question then becomes whether I’m doing this in order to create an identity to hold on to. But down that rabbit hole is not what this particular post is about. It’s very clear to me that I really enjoy training, being fit, and improving my health–mind, body, and spirit. However, much of my athletic life has been testosterone driven. The underlying

Vulnerability

Gratitude is a recurring theme in everything I do and there’s a reason for that. It helps me stay sane & healthy, and to train effectively. It helps me feel energised. It helps me feel connected to the present and to the Universe. On the other end of the spectrum is frustration. I’ve been working with an acupuncturist to unpack layers, remove blockages, and increase energy flow (Qi). (If you’re on Hawai’i and are interested in a treatment, contact me for more information.) It’s become very clear to me that when I feel frustrated with parts of my body or

Gratitude

I’ve been quite silent lately. It’s been clear that I’ve needed to write about gratitude, but I haven’t felt super grateful. Well, I have in some areas of my life, and not in others. Gratitude is defined as “the state of feeling appreciative for a kindness which has been granted or given, and (very often) of wanting to give something in return.” It’s the latter half of that description which I wouldn’t have verbalised but do, however, recognise as a key element. When the energy of gratitude is flowing in me I naturally smile, relax, and feel whole, while also

The Inside Happy

“It’s that Inside Happy feeling. You know what I mean?” While at the health food store yesterday evening I started chatting with one of the staff, whom I’ve not seen in a couple months because I’ve been travelling. Last we spoke I learned that she was a swimmer in high school and college but that she hadn’t been in the pool in ages. Our discussion at that time flowed between the topics of exercise, daily routines, and nutrition. She taught me a few things about sprouting, while I shared with her some of my favourite websites and books (listed below).

Should… Really?

“Should” What do you feel inside when reading that word and letting it echo in your system? Please note that I’m not talking about emotions but rather the kinaesthetic of it… the vibe in the system. For me there is tension, disaccord, pain, confusion. Interestingly, if the words are “you should”, and if I turn attention to the strong emotions and reactions that arise, the loudest noise comes from anger by the rebellious and hurt part of me that developed early in my life. To me, using should and shouldn’t imply an energy of forcing, of attempting to shoehorn life