It’s not all rainbows and roses.
Sometimes I sabotage myself. I eat, drink, and do things that do not support me. I always suffer the consequences, shake my head, and wonder how many times I have to make these same mistakes. Of course, the answer is simple, we do things until we don’t, until the interest in chasing the tail falls away. I know this from my own experience, from my spiritual teacher, and from hearing other’s stories.
In these ‘slip-ups’ I feel lost, confused, even disheartened. Fortunately, in the darkest part of my life, I was more-or-less forced to learn a deep lesson: life is a team effort. So, with that, I’ve gathered friends and professionals for support in the tough times, and to celebrate with me in my achievements.
Since embracing this as a lifestyle another layer became evident: Rich Roll expresses it nicely, “Pursue what’s in your heart, and the universe will conspire to support you.”
I suppose it could be called grace, or serendipity, but to become really alive and grow also requires commitment, time and again. In both athletics and recovery, it’s called ‘consistency’–keep showing up. Conspicuously, recommitment is both tiring and energising. I’m naturally an impatient, goal-oriented person; the endless inner-battle can drain me, but only when I get frustrated. The warrior’s path requires introspection. Feeling what’s actually true in my heart calms and refreshes me.
I wasn’t sure how the day would play out. I had failed myself. The repercussions were heavily uncomfortable. I bit off what I could chew, took small steps, stayed open, kept breathing, meditated, and made tea. Life was still happening around me. I knew that I wanted to participate. John Joseph amplifies this with his beautiful positive mental attitude, “You must fail to succeed – use every failure as a pillar of success.”
And then it started. Three friends happened to share thoughts–reflections that spoke directly to my heart. I listened and reached out to share, support, and be supported. The Universe was conspiring to help me.